Sunday, February 9, 2014

Movie Review: Vampire Academy

Vampire Academy
My rating: 1 of 5 stars
Director: Mark Waters
Genre: Action/Adventure, Sci-Fi/Fantasy
Released: February 7, 2014
Duration: 1 hr 44 min
Cast: Zoey Deutch, Lucy Fry, Danila Kozlovsky, Gabriel Byrne, Sarah Hyland
Rated: PG-13


Rose Hathaway is a Dhampir: half human/vampire, guardians of the Moroi, peaceful, mortal vampires living discretely within our world. Her legacy is to protect the Moroi from bloodthirsty, immortal Vampires, the Strigoi. This is her story.

My Thoughts {bzzzzzzzz}:

Guys. So, I watched Vampire Academy last night. I don't know if the trailers were any indication but IT WAS FUCKING HORRIBLE.

No, really like totally down the toilet bowl needs desperate help deserves a painful slow death needs to DIE cringe-worthy awkwardness really really really fucking awful shit.

I don't usually swear that much but man does this movie warrant that.

But now let's backtrack to BEFORE Vampire Academy the Book was even going to be made into Vampire Academy the Most Horrible Movie on the Planet.

Okay, ready?


I read VA and then I was like "Wow this is actually pretty good."

Then I read the next 5 books and was like "WOW this is a damn good series. Really Richelle Mead YOU deserve an award."

Fast foward a few years later. Me: 

"Oh, finally VA is being optioned film rights! Took you long enough to make the awesomeness that is Vampire Academy being made onto the big screen."
Then, we finally get the casting and blah blah blah.

But then one of the most important part comes:

the trailer

And my reaction was like " doesn't look too bad but it doesn't look great either. I'm still excited though!"

Then, the second trailer comes out and I'm like "NOW this is more like it. Give me somethin' more like this."

Now, I'm generally pretty excited for February 7th and can't wait to see the movie. Finally, after a long awaited wait, I get to go the theater.

So, I sit down watching a blank screen (I got there around 45 minutes early don't ask me why), munching on my popcorn and anticipating this movie. I'm thinking, "I hope they really portray the quality of the book onto the big screen well" and "this is so cool, I can't wait to see Rose kick some ass."

Whoa, was I so very, so THOROUGHLY disappointed. 

Don't get me wrong, I had some doubts before I went to see the movie as I do with all YA book to movie adaptations. But did I ever in my wildest dreams think that VA would be THIS horrible as a movie? The answer would be no. I didn't think the movie people would or could screw it up this bad. Honestly, this was one of the worst movies I've ever seen and not to mention THE worst book to movie adaptation I have ever seen.

It's really a shame because the Vampire Academy series is one of my favorites and the movie was nothing like it. Not even close. The line of offenses are so long I can't even count. My tweets after the movie will give you just a few: 
The whole thing sucked but a huge thing that irked me was the acting and rushed pacing. It just blurred from one scene to the next and the scenes itself felt very rushed as well. Oh, and the acting. Couldn't you guys just get that one thing right? Is that too much to ask? That was HORRENDOUS.

The bottom line is when you go see a movie you really shouldn't be cringing and rolling your eyes every other second. That's just poor.

The really sad and disappointing thing for me was that the movie didn't do the books justice AT ALL.
The only best part I can think of was The Fault in Our Stars and Divergent trailers (if that counts). Oh, and the ending.

Have any you guys seen the movie? If you have, tell me what you think. Don't worry I won't bite your head off if you do happen to like it. It just wasn't my cup of tea.
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